last fri went dragonfly with monyet songhua meishan and zhaocheng...a fun night..haha..enjoy it alot..didnt order alot but duno why got felt drank alot..haha...after then went jalan besar for dinner then head home... then sat meet songhua and went to boat quay for a walk and in the end ended up in a pub drinking red wine..haha..so long never drink le..more and more like the taste of red wine..haha..after tat monyet meishan came and we went for supper then head home...sun went to pray ah gong then afternoon went Lim chu kang pray wai po tehn went coffeeshop find songhua and skinny...after tat went home and slack..haha...

yesterday after work went meet xiong monyet meishan then went for dinner and wait for songhua and the rest then went to Beds to celebrate zhixiong bday...drank 2 bottle of tua pao..haha...in the end he drunk until siao and went home..haha..left us finish everything then went home too...then today work damn shag...haha..lucky i survive it..haha...but enjoy the night...haha...

maybe i'm not the one you need and trust...atleast this is how i felt..i duno why..maybe i really not the one you trust...hai..maybe i think too much..maybe i'm not...maybe i am just too sensetive...i duno...but the way you react and show me i feel that i was taken for granted...maybe you duno and not purposely but you duno that it hurts me alot...very disappointed...maybe i really not the one you needed...maybe just an option to you everytime...i duno...i really duno why it became like this...maybe is my fault..everything is my fault...maybe...you never how much you hurt me time to time...i never say but that doesnt mean it is not pain it is just that i wish to keep it to myself cause i know once said things will never be the same anymore...i am scare of this too..in the end i'm actually still a human..i do have feeling...maybe you never notice but it really hurts everytime you like this...maybe i'm too petty sometime i tend to remember alot of things...esp yours...i never fail to do wat i promise you but your promise always bounce back...hai...i think i am thinking too much le...everything is a wrong from the start..i knew it but i just let it continue because i cant control it also...everyone told me that goods one doesnt last doesnt pay but i just cant be the bad one...esp to you...taken for granted or not sometime i really dont care but please spare a though for my feeling sometime...i'm still a human with feelings....hai...never felt appreciated before even though i dont really mind it...maybe i just wan to be recongise and a small appreciation can make me feel better and good...maybe i not the one you really need but i do help..and can help...hai....sometime i really duno why am i doing those things...thinking tat where do i stand in your heart...maybe i just not so important to you ba...hai...so much maybe in the end...i really duno wat to do...so tired..so restless..so helpless...so painful...hai...how i wish i can forget everything...but i know i cant...hai...

Devil cries too...