Sunday, August 06, 2006
Went drowning yesterday...drink alot...and really alot...i very long time nv drink until fall asleep in cab liao...very fun yesterday...enjoy alot...should be the last drink in this month cos Final Exam coming liao..so cannot drink already....very happy day until i think of some stupid thing...and become moody...but in the end i fuck care abt it and enjoy my day...
duno why everytime i drink i tend to think alot...and really is alot...and alot is negative thing...all the problem will come out...althought i know come out play is to enjoy...and i try very hard...but it is just not like last time when i was still young...alot of thing had change...i really enjoy and miss my last time havoc days...i now only more relax more quiet down due to my age and some stuffs ...but i lost all the fun all the happiness...although i gain something else...i gain more care frm my family...more trust frm family...and i know who care about me...and more normal life...but this thing make me lost my crazy days...although i know the way of life is when you gain something you will lose some...but this is not what i wan...maybe i am more greedy...i wan both...my fun life and my family...although my past is like a mess but i enjoy it...and nv regret it...but now it is all gone...i duno whether i am happy or not...not that i am sad...i just dun feel anything anymore...abit numb...duno how then consider happy...how not...everyone have problems...but sometime i cant cope mine...maybe to others mine is not a problem...but it bothers me...i give peace a chance, but peace dont give me once...maybe i am just too greedy...but i am satisfied now as i get more care from family...maybe i shouldnt think soo much...maybe a simple life suit me more...or maybe is i to early come out play...now there is nothing to play liao...thats y i feel numb...maybe this problem of mine all the while is not a problem...haha...haiz...Sorry to let you worry about me yesterday....
坚强得太久好疲惫,
要醉得清醒要知道我是谁,
记不得幸福是什么滋味,
无路可退,我怎么流不出泪....
现实的世界只有灰.....
and it's the end....
到此为止...
